Wednesday, June 06, 2018

The First Week Back:

Well, what a first week it's been! (as in first week back, after the half term break). To say it's been fraught, would be an understatement.

In all honesty, I knew it was going to be rough on Sunday. I told my teen son to get in the shower, as it was back to school the next day........when I saw my little ones face change.

Bad mama, I'd forgotten to warn him, to prepare him. I don't know why I didn't, I think I was simply exhausted after a busy week. I usually start counting down, a couple of days before, so he doesn't get upset.

And, boy, did he get upset!

From the moment it dawned on him, he started getting worked up. There were tears, and lots of "I don't want to go to school tomorrow". He went to bed at the usual time, but wouldn't go to sleep, I fell asleep at, just before, midnight, he wasn't asleep then. Come the morning, he was difficult to wake up, when he did wake, he hid under his covers.

I tried every trick, that would normally work: Bribery, cajoling, threatening to remove technology. Nothing worked, it just got him more worked up. He is too big to physically lift and wouldn't get out of bed. I went up the school, to explain to his, understanding, teacher.

In the end we got him to agree to go in Tuesday, with a bit of persuasion.

Now, let's get one thing straight: School refusal, when your child is autistic, with other issues, isn't just a cantankerous child. If you witnessed the anxiety, almost terror, of going into something unprepared, you would understand. He's had this problem since he very first started, he doesn't particularly like leaving the house, at all.

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So, Tuesday came, and went, in a surprisingly calm manner. He was prepared, morning routines were back to normal, he went in happy and smiling.

Wednesday morning was the same, until lunchtime. Because of my son's vulnerabilities, and the fact I live very close, I bring him home every lunchtime. He came out in tears, his teacher explained why (nothing serious), then he ran, all the way home. This meant I had to run all the way home. He won't stop when called, he has to be within grabbing distance, as he has no danger awareness, and there are roads to cross.

It took much persuasion, again, to get him back in the afternoon......but I did! I had to sit with him in reception, until one of his teachers could come get him. He was unresponsive, and very near tears, incredibly hard to walk away from. I was a little upset getting home, so messaged his teacher, his lovely teacher told me he was in class, and sent me a pic of him having fun, practising for sports day.

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All in all, it's been an eventful start to the week!

Final word goes to Ajax, when I asked him why: "Sometimes I'm just not ready, and I miss you"

So, how do you cope when your child refuses to go to school?
Do they have additional needs?

2 comments:

  1. Ahh! Sending hugs to you!
    My youngest has been reluctant to go to school this week but it's just because she has been tired and didn't want to get out of bed, get dressed, eat breakfast or move. Totally different to your situation but I have felt stressed each morning with all the nagging I've had to do but thankfully she has gone into school each day smiling and on time.
    Aww! Bless Ajax. It must be so hard for you. I think in your situation I would just want to keep him at home but it's not always right. x

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  2. I tried everything too, I don't know what else you can do except keep trying and hoping this speed bump passes x

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