Thursday, June 18, 2020

June Update

It was only today, as I was posting a selfie on my Instagram page (ojosworld, if you want to nose), that I realise I hadn't written anything for over a month. I don't write often these days, because I don't think my life is that interesting. However, I do miss putting my thoughts down on here, maybe I should pick my laptop up more often.

Thursday, May 07, 2020

The happy lockdown..

I know, I'm weird!

Now, before I start, I'm not saying we haven't had bad days, or down days. I've needed to take myself away, for peace, to my bedroom, the hubby has spent time pottering in the garden for his 'alone' time. I'm also not taking away from those that are struggling, all our situations are very different, how I'm feeling does not take away from those that are finding this situation incredibly hard.

I think the main reason we are happy is because I'm not taking on any of the stress. I'm fortunate that I don't have any very young children, I think I might feel very different in that situation. We aren't focusing on school work, my youngest (as those that read regularly will know) is 12 and has autism. He is very black and white in regards to home/school, so school work would give him all the anxiety. Thankfully the special school he goes to is okay with this situation. They are sending home 'challenges', that they can complete at their own speed and abilities, but they have also been a big no no, so far. We have focused more on cooking, gardening and playing the games/puzzles in his Lego magazines. These provide learning, without him realising, in a very fun way.


My teen, who is doing music in college is completing all his work, without prompting, probably because he's doing something he utterly loves. I barely see him, if I'm honest, he spends most of his time chatting to his friends, via his games console (aren't we glad of them now!). I have, however, given him a very funky new hair cut!



The thing about our current situation is that it's not that different from my usual home life. I don't see many people, only parents and my eldest son, normally. Believe me, I'm missing them, but thanks to modern technology, I speak to them all the time. My mother calls or face times me, every day, I speak to my father around once a week, also on face time. The one I miss the most is my biggest boy, but we also face time, when he's not too busy! He's still working (Dominoes didn't shut at all) and completing his final year of uni, via the laptop.

We aren't a very 'outdoorsy' family. My youngest hates leaving the house, when we do it has to be well planned, with technology and wheelchair a must. I am not a big lover of outdoors either, I'm terrified of all the flying bugs and I burn to a crisp at the first sign of sunshine! 

Honestly, my biggest anxiety is about this lock down being over, having to go out, but still being sure that people I love are safe.

I also wonder what the world will look like when we leave. Will things change, or go back to normal straight away? Will we have to stop being tactile with people? (I'll find that one hard, I do love a cwtch).

How are you coping with this current situation?
I'm always here, if anyone does need someone to chat to.

Stay Safe.

Friday, April 03, 2020

The art of giving up?

I'll be honest, I don't write as much anymore and, when I do, it rolls itself around my brain for a while first. When I first started to think of this one, Coronavirus wasn't a word I'd ever heard of, now it's on all our minds.

When I originally started thinking of this, I had just given up slimming world. I'd finally decided I'd had enough of diets. I've never been small, the smallest I had ever been was a UK 14, that was when I was in my mid teens, even then I was mostly a 16 though. If I went shopping with friends, I would take smaller sizes into the changing rooms, and swap the hangers over, so it looked like I was a smaller size.

I'm so tired of feeling that way, so I gave up every single diet I've ever been on. I'm still keeping an eye on the scales and, guess what? They haven't moved!

Now, when I started mulling this over, I had no idea how much we would actually be giving up. Now we are all staying indoors as much as we can, with limited freedoms.

I'm lucky that I love home cooked meals, so the shopping for essentials hasn't been that hard for me. The only part I found a little difficult, is the fact that I can't go shopping. I have diabetes, multiple vitamin deficiencies, amongst other problems. This means, even though my husband is physically disabled, I'm the one at risk of Coronavirus. I also worry about my youngest, being autistic doesn't put him at risk, but he also has vitamin deficiencies, including, like me, very low iron.

I've had to give up my dog walks! I have taken two, the first one scared the crap out of me because of young men not social distancing, and having a dog off the lead (My dog does not like other dogs). The second time, we took the youngest, in his wheelchair, which makes it easier for the mister, he can use it like a walker. It was a pleasant walk, but I'm so anxious being outside. I've made face masks, I saw a pattern online, so we all wore those, but I'm still so nervous.

Now, this is the funny part. Apart from those two very small things, my life really hasn't changed that much! My youngest hates going out, the only way he'll do it is 
a: in the car 
or 
b: when he is in control. 
He sets where we go, when we will leave, when it gets too much. By allowing him to do this, and using his wheelchair, we actually get to have days out. Yes, they are rare, but we can go out. At the moment he knows he's not in control of what is happening, so staying home is a good thing.

He has never been a fan of school. Yes, he's settled lovely into his new special base, but if he didn't have to go again, he'd been fine. After years of school refusal, having him home isn't really a shock. We aren't focusing on school work, he's very black and white when it comes to school and home. I have played some sneaky games, when he's in the mood, that are educational. 

So, I know we all have to give up so much, right now, but this too shall pass.

I do wonder what the world we emerge to will be like?

How are you doing with the lock down?