I am working hard on getting myself fit and healthy, you've seen that, right??
I have vowed to do at least 10k steps every day for the month of June, I've gone well over most days. My diet has changed immensely, thanks to my pods, I am making better choices without even thinking about it. Walking past chocolate without a backward glance. Still eating barely any crisps, which were my main addiction. I am genuinely trying! I am by no means perfect, but I think I am pretty damn good.
Then came yesterday, my 3 monthly diabetic check up.
Before I say anymore, let me share these pictures:
I am not fishing for compliments here, I KNOW I've lost weight. The green dress in the second comparison pic didn't fit me a year ago. In fact, the top I wore to my diabetic appointment didn't fit a month ago! So obviously I should have been expecting some positive results.
When I got there I was told, in summary, my sugars had gone up and my weight had stayed the same........how!?
Mr. Ojo came in with me, because I kind of guessed it wasn't going to go my way, it never does. Excuse the expression, but he lost his shit. How can my body change that much, yet their scales say EXACTLY the same! There is a difference in the scales between the dates on the 2nd comparison picture. A whole 9kg! (18lb, roughly 1.5stone).
I ended up in tears. I am doing everything right, but I left there feeling like a liar. Quite frankly I feel like there is no f**king point! Why am I working this hard to be healthy, yet nothing is changing?!
Also, this may just be my thoughts, but if you were seeing someone about their health and it wasn't improving, even with medication............wouldn't you want to know why?
What is wrong with my body?
Why won't the diabetic nurse believe me?
Why won't they help me?!
I am close to tears, writing this, again.
I can't work any harder! I am going to the gym daily, I don't go lightly on myself, I work HARD. I go to Zumba when I can, life is getting in the way a bit, and the gym is there when the children are in school.
Also, my iron is still low, I'm still taking vitamin D, even though I'm out when the sun is shining. I'm also still fighting with tiredness a lot of the time, I don't want to go back to the Dr, because I won't get any help.
I really don't know what to do anymore.