I said I would write more about Autism this month (April), as it is still Autism Awareness Month. I have written several posts about my children, my beautiful, special, happy children.
I haven't written about me though.
How does being the parent of a child with Autism effect me?
There is a reason I have not written about it, other parents........
They judge. Hell, I probably judge a little! Don't we all?
What happens when you write about how exhausted you are, is people will comment about how that is the same for all parents. They will get a little defensive.
I am not saying my tiredness is more, or less, important that any other parents. But it is different.
My little one will not leave my side, will not be in any room on his own...........but will rarely leave the house.
Which means I can't leave the house.
I have 2 children that wander, so it is difficult to take them anywhere alone.
Which means I can't go far.
My little one, if he wakes in the night, panics if he can't see anyone, even though his brother is in the bed right next to his. This means he comes looking for me.
Which means I can't sleep properly.
My children speak in 'code' (not really, but you do have to work out what they want). You need to understand this 'code' to look after them. I understand the code.
So I can't leave them often.
Most children, if they do any of the above, grow out of it by school age. My son is now 6, and will behave similarly for a few years yet.
So when you see me out alone, it will either be very fleeting, as I rush back to them. Or it means my hubby is at home.........He will also be exhausted, because he has to work full time to support us.
It is different.
It just is!