Wednesday, June 12, 2013

A Post about THAT post

I wrote a post tonight, I have sought advice from my husband and best friend.......and decided not to publish, yet.

Yesterday I wrote a letter to me. It was really cathartic, helped me get my head straight. It lead me to think of another relationship in my life. This particular relationship has been fractious for a very long time.

It has effected every part of my life. My relationships, my self worth.....everything.

The problem with posting the post is the backlash, and there will be a big one.

I am not strong enough to deal with it. I am not a strong person full stop. Whenever I say something that seems needy I will get private comments telling me I'm selfish etc. I take those to heart, and find it really difficult to get over. 

I can't hold grudges, so even if someone has upset me deeply, I will be the first to make up the relationship. I can't be the reason someone is upset, I can't be the bad guy, I simply can't cope!

Of course there will only be fallout, if the person actually reads it, which in itself is very doubtful. You know recently I managed to get 3 articles published. 
Not one of my family members told me they were proud.

My mum came the closest, she told me it was OK. That is just my mum though, she's not the most emotional person. She does love me though, and apparently had told everyone she knew!

Don't think I am including my hubby, he couldn't tell me enough how proud he was, he wants me to do more. Which I will, once an idea of what to write forms. Even when I am writing my posts on here I don't write a few in advance, these are written, proof read and published. Just like that. That way I know that I will always write the truth..........and from the heart.

Back to the original post, I will publish it, one day. I feel a little better for writing it, but especially for 2 people who's opinion I value, to have read it. 

4 comments:

  1. i would say publish it but only if you want others to read it. But don't read the comments if your not strong enough to read the negative comments. Alternatively you could sift through, just concentrating on the positive delete the bullies(or have a friend do it and read out). So may people just go out of there way to be awful and i don't believe 90% of what people write about or reply as a comment they would do or say in real life. Sadly many people just use the net to be a bully and say whatever they believe will get a rise out of others (big bonus if they can upset someone, they feel self righteous and on top rather than the nobody they and they would never dare write a constructive piece of writing and publish it. In my opinion those who cant even use constructive criticism or be upset by something and then argue there point without name calling and personal attacks should be banned permanently from commenting on the net.in some ways we are lucky that the net has given us all at platform to be heard unfortunately in many cases empty vessels make the mose noise just bullying and trying to hurt others. Many are actually in breach of the law if they make it personal and you would be well within you rights to prosecute trollers who attack you for your freedom of speech beliefs on a subject etc. However be careful what you blog because should you right about a person ant they believe it to be them you would then be up for liable and or slander. Maybe some pieces are best written down and out of the for front of your mind and never published due to sensitivity???? Good luck whatever you decide to do.

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  2. How about Blogynonymous? Or as an anonymous guest post on a friend's blog? That might help perhaps? Best of luck with your decision, but for you it may be cathartic to publish x

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  3. I've published things I shouldn't, personal things. It felt good to publish them though. But I understand you not wanting to. I second the suggestion of posting it anon on another blog. X

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  4. I've laid myself pretty bare on my blog, my family actually finds out more from there than what I tell them!
    I can understand being nervous to expose yourself to a backlash, perhaps turn comments off for that post if you can.

    Posting anon on someone else's blog is a good idea, hope it helped getting it written down.

    And 3 published articles! damn woman you make me so proud xx

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I do love comments and read them all, please be nice and tboughful to others x