Monday, October 15, 2012

I've changed

So, I went out Saturday night. It was hard to do originally, but while I was getting ready, I was actually looking forward to it!

I do love a good boogy, and a few voddies always help bring out the Beyonce in me. I realised though that I have changed and I just needed to say..............

Its not you, Its me..
Goodness, that's a line I never thought I'd say!!

I really did enjoy myself, and I shall definitely do it again. I was, however, ready to come home at 11.30! If you'd told me a few months ago that I would feel like this I would of laughed in you face!!

I was out every weekend, never home before midnight, normally in the hour after that. But something has changed in me and I honestly don't know what it is.

I got really low for a while, thinking that I had no one, I had gotten really hard on myself. When I look back on it, my friends were texting, emailing and messaging, it was me that was shutting myself off.

Saturday night it was like a switch had been flicked! I knew so many people that were out, but by 11pm I was starting to feel a little disconnected. Its difficult to explain...I really was having fun, I was quite tipsy, and dancing like a mad woman, but I was ready for home.

Sunday morning I was up as normal, hubby cooked us all a breakfast, and I felt like doing a bit of cooking.

I spent the most of Sunday in my kitchen, experimenting with some sugar free baking (that went completely wrong!), making bread and helping R bake his own cakes.

I have never been happier.

So I don't know why or when it happened, but it did......
I've changed.....
and I don't care!

Some of my friends might think I've got boring.....well guess what....that's your problem, not mine!!

I want to bake on a Sunday with the kids!
I am loving sitting down and relaxing with my knitting!
I love writing my blog and I love reading others!

For the 1st time in ages I genuinely don't give a shit what anyone thinks!! I have a loving home, with kids that need me and a hubby who (I hope) adores me.

I am not 100% healthy, I have diabetes and struggle to walk on my ankle that I broke a couple of years ago, and if I want to moan about it.......I'm going to!! If you don't like it don't bloody read it!

I will go out again for a night with friends, it will be nerve wracking for me to do, but I'll still do it, just not as often as I used to.......because I'm equally happy staying home!

So this is me, I have outed myself for what I really am, like it or not.......I don't care.....

xOjox 

2 comments:

  1. Not boring at all .... Just living and enjoying the small but best things in life...family xxx perfect I'd say ....and there's nothing like a good moan to the people who care and will listen.
    Fab post was following via twitter now following blog via networked blog xxx

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    1. Thank you! For your follow and your comment. I think I'm finally feeling comfortable with who I really am :-) x

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